Starting last fall, I started having moods that I had not had before in Honduras. I would get frustrated, angry, depressed and just not very pleasant. I know it was hard on the staff here and especially Henry and also to some of my Christian friends at home. At first, I thought I was just tired and didn't understand what was going on most of the time. The longer I stay here, the more I want to be able to communicate with the people on a more personal level but I just have not been able to learn Spanish. I always say that it is my age or God just wants the staff to learn Engllish but I think now it is more than that...I think God is trying very hard to make me know how dependent I am on Him. I know, like most people, that we think we are in control and we are not. God can wipe that control right out of our hands any time He wants to.
I have a book written by Bill Bright called First Love. I have had the book for a long time, I have never opened it or paid much attention to it but it ended up in my suitcase this time when I returned to Honduras. I have been reading it and it is all aboout me. When I first came to Honduras, I knew that God had called me here to work at the ministry and I felt so blessed to be used by Him. As time went on, I quit focusing on God and His will for me and I started focusing on the work being done. I left my lifeline. I am like the church at Ephesus that God talks about in Revelations, I left my first love. Now I know why this book was in my suitcase, God wanted me to come back to my first love. I have to keep my focus on God and not the work being done and to give God the glory for all of it.
This is the last paragraph in the book.
"If this love I have now--this first love is only partial, I can only say that I long foor the final edition. If the abundance of this life in only a foretaste, I long for the full meal. And if my comprehension of God now if just a glance through a hazy mirror, I long for a complete and unimpaired view. Praise God, what a day that will be!! I can hardly wait.
But for now, we have something wonderful. It cannot compare to the glories of heaven, but it is still the most wonderful thing in this world. I refer to the indescribable love of God. Cling to it. Cherish it and nurture it every day. Make your first love be your lasting, permanent love, and God will grant you wonderful blessings beyond any imagining. And be sure to share your renewed first love with others."
Now for the things that are going on in Honduras. I asked Henry last night to please not add any more new programs, I can't keep up with where I am suppose to be. He is doing a great job and loves the Lord so much that he wants others to love the Lord as much as he does. The staff works so hard to accomplish the vision that Henry has.
It is such a blessing to be in a place where God is the center of everything that we do. Not that we don't get upset and lose our focus as I said above but we refocused and keep on going.
Our first big team arrives and there will be one team right after another until sometime in August. We will really have to concentrate on making time to adjust our focus for He is our strength.
The tutoring programs are going well. We have a pilot program in El Jaral that has been operating since March. We will start four more programs in different villages this month. Because of limited resoureces and staff, we are having to be selective in the villages we put the programs. Allan, a young man that was born in Honduras but raised by Baptist missionaries is helping us and doing an excellant job. I told Henry that a teacher is born and I don't think a person that has a true heart for teaching can learn that in school.
The men's and women's ministries are doing well. They have lots of projects to help the people learn to make their own living and not wait for someone to give them what they need. The Pastor's Bible Study is growing and more and more people are being affected by it.
I have enjoyed the squash and okra in the garden that the men planted. We are going to add to our small plot and plant corn and beans on a larger plot next to it. The men can then sell the vegetables to the soup kitchens and make some money to feed their families.
The container arrived and we have been distributing lots of clothes and other items that you so generously sent to Honduras. We still have a lot of things to give away but hopefully we will provide them to the people that truly need them.
Please pray for the staff here at Sal y Luz and the teams that are preparing to come and not only get a blessing but also receive a blessing.
We love you all.
